What I Learned About Being Happy

impmsgWont you say that the pursuit of happiness is one thing that is programed in most of us?  Not counting mentally unstable individuals, its safe to assume that we all want to be happy. The interesting thing though is how little we know about what it takes to be happy or satisfied. We often seek happiness only to create suffering.

I use the words ‘happy’ and ‘satisfied’ interchangeably, the way I see it they are the same. Suffering also needs to be clarified here, suffering encompasses any of these: stress, negative emotions, misery, pain, etc.

Why is the list below so long (80+ topics)? Well, after getting a pulmonary embolism last week, a potentially lethal medical condition, I decided to write down a list of ideas and concepts that are dear to me in one post and to push them out on the Internet. This article is essentially my message to the world; I was planning on writing an article for each of (or a combination of) the topics listed below; as you will notice some article have already been written; however, who knows if I’ll live long enough or if I’ll ever have the time to write articles on all these topics.

The list below is a compilation of things I learned or developed (through thought processes), philosophies, beliefs and ideas that I consider dear to my heart and I do live by.  I do not want to take credit for any of the topics below, these were passed on to me through people, nature and other life events. I only learned them, tried to sincerely live them, and now, wrote them down. I believe that the more of these that you embrace the more satisfied and happy you will become.

Please share your tips for happiness by leaving a comment.

Message to the world, brought to you by Wholeness Blog:

  1. Appreciate and delight in the smallest things and the simplest things.
  2. Plan the future but don’t get obsessed about it. You can plan so much, but when something unplanned happens, then it is what it is, collect yourself and move on.
  3. Many unexpected things may happen, sometimes things are what they are, sometimes they are not. Know which is which.
  4. If you are faced with bad news, a bad reality, you will have to first accept it before you can deal with it. Some people go through denial and other moods, but you cannot move forward until you accept reality.
  5. Take what you have and go along with it. Make the best with what you have.
  6. See the positives and the lessons in everything  you experience.
  7. Don’t see the obstacles and the so called ‘negative’ things, you will only pull yourself away from living a better life.
  8. When you dream or plan, be free, explore all the possibilities, identify your dream as if no restrictions exist at all. Then, add the restrictions, examine which are real and which are self imposed, then create plans.
  9. There is no good or bad. A few things are absolute good or bad, the rest are all in between, they are shades of gray. Even in your life, what you see as bad, may actually be good, your evaluation of something as bad is your own opinion, your own view, and your view is influenced by your mind set. (Read this on the good and bad).
  10. Keep your mind OPEN to seeing the good in everything.
  11. Stop and notice nature, birds, the wind, beaches, rain, smells, grass, dew drops, plant leaves, etc.. and see the beauty and life in them.. See the good in them.
  12. See the good in you, all you’ve done, all you’ve overcome, the past events and challenges you lived through. Appreciate what you’ve managed to do and deal with. See how all these things made you who you are now and how they made you more mature and stronger.
  13. Respect yourself. If you don’t no one will.
  14. Love yourself. If you don’t no one will.
  15. See the good that you have, your healthy blood, brain, eyes, ears, oh so many things that you are fortunate to have.
  16. Demand respect of others, BUT give it back.
  17. Treat others as you wish to be treated.
  18. Make peace not war, in your mind, in your heart, with others, with nature and with everything.
  19. Appreciate what you got. Do not take anything for granted. We got countless of things that should not be taken fro granted, for instance: Your house, the roads, the water, sewers, the food, the highway system, having fuel, electricity, the sun, the clean air, the money you have, your job, pets, rain, the night sky, green plants, fruits and on top of them all your health.
  20. Remember, so many people are not as blessed as you are.
  21. Remember, so many people are born with no eye sight, some can’t hear, some can’t walk or even think. Some die at 5, others at 55.
  22. When someone gives you advice, listen.
  23. Don’t be afraid of asking, asking for clarification or for assistance. It doesn’t hurt to ask.
  24. Feel proud about common goodness. Feel happy for your neighbor’s happiness. Remember, those people you hear of getting sick or having some disability (or loose a job or have no health insurance), all these individuals who were unfortunate, any one of them could have been you. (Read the article titled ‘it could have been me’).
  25. Question the norms, be critical of everything. You got a brain, use it. Everything in life is a system, these are systems made by us, explore the possibilities of what could have been and what could be. From the social system, religious system, educational, food, military, etc.. All man made systems that are neither perfect nor set in stone. Be truly free and question everything.
  26. Celebrate and enjoy humanity. Don’t let these systems keep you from it, unless you prefer being alone, which is also normal.
  27. If you are fortunate enough to have loved ones that want to be with you and accept you as-you-are without allowing their ego or their belief system to come between you, know that you are lucky. Again, appreciate what you have, and who you have.
  28. You will die, because you are living. Life and Death are coupled.
  29. It is never too early to know that you are going to die, even a 10 year old kid needs to know that people die, that they will die, that they could even die tomorrow.
  30. Know that death is expected, it is how life and nature work. Your life on earth should probably be seen as a privilege, not a right.
  31. Death is not to be feared, in fact when you die your pain will go away, you will be JUST fine. It is your loved ones who will be hurting for your departure. So don’t worry about yourself, worry about the ones that love you.
  32. Since your life on Earth is finite and it is more of a privilege than a right, for goodness sake do good while you are alive, make a difference. Leave your planet and your community better off than when you joined them.
  33. Do not bring other life to Earth (i.e. get pregnant or impregnate someone) because it is not your right to make life, it’s a privilege, it is the babies privilege. Creating new life is not about you it’s about what you are creating.
  34. If you cannot support a child, or if the country you live in has a bad standard of living, or overpopulation, DO NOT have a child, help the planet and spare one person from suffering. When the resources balance with the demand everybody will live happier and healthier. It is about quality not quantity.
  35. Quality matters more than quantity (of anything).
  36. Seek God within, and in nature and in other people. We are all part of a living planet and a living system, we are part of life, i.e God.
  37. Live in harmony with God (i.e with other living things depending on your definition of living things).
  38. Appreciate what you have even if it was little (of anything).
  39. Enjoy life while you can, no I don’t mean go party and get drunk. Enjoy life like it was meant to be enjoyed. Smell the trees and flowers, touch the grass, adore the sky, walk in nature, respect your fellow living creatures on this planet, do good, create progress and peace, advance humanity.
  40. Be truly alive, that is how you enjoy being alive. No one can enjoy life in a stuffy crowded bar with many other people. I call that a jungle with one species the human species. Life is a jungle, but it is a better jungle when there are multiple species in it, especially when considering that the humans species is the most dangerous one.
  41. Keep a positive outlook on things.
  42. Know that you are much stronger than you know. You can tap into your inner strength to reach many of your goals.
  43. Work hard because you will enjoy the outcome better.
  44. Do not work too hard, if you are getting sick due to work then you are working too hard (or studying too hard)
  45. Do not lust for money, if you do, you will waste the chance to enjoy many beautiful things, you will loose priceless things.
  46. Meditate & sleep. If you are sick, tiered, moody, with a headache, go get some sleep and follow it with meditation. You will get better. (Read from Medication to Meditation)
  47. Live every day as if it was your last, it may well be. Even if you are 10 years old, or 100 years old. We all die, we just die at different times for different reasons.
  48. Don’t feel bad for yourself, take what you have and work with it, and learn from it. Do the best with what you have. Don’t waste time and energy feeling bad, make changes to feel better. It’s up to you
  49. Don’t go to bed holding anger or while someone is holding anger against you.  Try to make peace with others before going to bed. Consider this, they or you may not wake up.
  50. All food is good food, do not take it for granted, embrace it. Dormitory food is yummy and abundant, hospital food smells great ans is taken to your bed, that tomato is red and luscious, the cucumber is crunchy and cold, the water is pure, the mango is sweet , the cheese is silky. Appreciate where food came from and the effort it took to bring to your table. Know that many people are not as fortunate to have the food you have. See what I’m trying to say, there is a lot to be adored about any food.
  51. Tap into the child within you. Inside of each of us there is that same innocent curious spirit that you had as a child.  Be easily amused, be easily impressed, be easily pleased and keep that curiosity and smile on your face.
  52. If you are not learning and using your brain, why do you then have a brain? and why are you better than a cow?
  53. You can learn from everything, from every breath you take, every step you walk, every person you meet, every event you witness, every tree you stare at, every day you live, and every time you sit in silence.
  54. You can learn all the time, you only have to be willing to. Look for learning in everything.
  55. Know what it means to be brave, and be brave, every day.
  56. Know what it means to be a woman or a man, or a human, and be one.
  57. Half the battle is knowing what you want. But, it is even more important to know WHO you are first, once you do, then you can know what you want in life (short and long term goals). Once that is done you can proceed forward.
  58. You decide if you want to be happy or sad, these emotions come from inside of you and you control them, they are not created by external factors (i.e. shopping, food, other people, events..).
  59. Live life, but always accept and don’t forget about death. It’s like inhaling and exhaling, you can’t enjoy the first and not the later
  60. The more you want, the more suffering you will encounter. Do not be greedy.
  61. All suffering comes from wanting, the more content you are the more at peace you will be. Don’t be greedy.
  62. Learn the relationship between your mind, spirit and body.
  63. Do good, you will feel good.
  64. Do good, you will make others feel good.
  65. Go good, because not doing good is bad.
  66. Meditate.
  67. Practice mindfulness meditation.
  68. Be modest.
  69. Be humble.
  70. Be opinionated.
  71. Be proud.
  72. Be alive.
  73. Be nice.
  74. Be smart.
  75. Be brave.
  76. Seek wisdom.
  77. Respect the elderly. They lived longer than you, they probably are wiser than you.
  78. Smile, the world will smile back.
  79. Identify your fears, analyze them, know them, make peace with them.
  80. If you get time off work, get sick time, summer break, or get laid off: Spend time with loved ones, talk, play board games watch movies. Turn time away from work, regardless of the reason, into pleasant social time.
  81. The best things, are free.
  82. Beauty is in the simplest things.The points below have been contributed by readers like you:
  83. Keep your body fit – exercise is vital to happiness. (by Jacqueline)
  84. This moment is all you have. The past and the future are out of your control – enjoy THIS MOMENT  (by Jacqueline)
  85. Be KIND to yourself (by Andy)


  1. April 16th, 2009 at 18:03 | #1

    Loved your message to the world! Can I just add a couple of tips of my own that spring to mind?

    1. Keep your body fit – exercise is vital to happiness.
    2. This moment is all you have. The past and the future are out of your control – enjoy THIS MOMENT.

    I hope your health continues to improve.
    Live Life Happy!

  2. April 17th, 2009 at 06:08 | #2

    really enjoyed this post

    guess all i can say is be KIND to yourself

  3. April 17th, 2009 at 06:35 | #3

    @Jacqueline Johns – Your Happy Life Mentor
    Jacqueline,
    Thanks for contributing these couple points, these are right to the point, very valuable. Thanks for making the list better :)

  4. April 17th, 2009 at 06:36 | #4

    @andy
    Andy,
    Nice to hear from you, that is a very good point. One I often neglect the most. Thank you for making the above list more complete. :)

  5. April 17th, 2009 at 07:00 | #5

    Hi Ethan

    aye it took me over 40 yrs to learn that one

    all the best

    andy

  6. April 17th, 2009 at 07:08 | #6

    @andy
    Andy,
    This makes that particular advice all the more valuable.
    I always respect others life experiences and take advice seriously. It is good to learn from other people’s lives and experiences, rather than learn the hard way. Yet many times one just has to learn the hard way ;)

    Thanks

  7. April 18th, 2009 at 16:01 | #7

    Great post! Thanks for putting it all down in black and white for your readers- it really is helpful!

  8. April 18th, 2009 at 16:13 | #8

    @Erika
    Erika, thank you. I’m glad you liked it :)

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